Dear Tate,

 Dear Tate,

You're 12 now.  I have no idea how that happened.  And with all of the madness right after you turned 11 I missed writing you your birthday letter last year.  I'll make this a really good one, I promise kiddo. You are just the best first child, oldest brother, role model, guinea pig that we could ask for, Tate.  You are a gentle, kind big brother.  You are always willing to play games or read books or wrestle with your little siblings.  You jump on any job I ask you to help with whether it's taking out the garbage or emptying the dishwasher, or making the kids lunch with an immediate, "Absolutely, Mom!"  You are patient and forgiving of your dad and I when we make mistakes and admittedly bumble through this parenting thing.  It's amazing and baffling and I'm grateful every day for the way you lead our family and your siblings.

Fifth grade was a little tricky for you but not nearly as difficult as I would have imagined for your first year of middle school.  I wished that your teachers were just a little bit gentler with your little tender heart at times, but they both seemed to appreciate the unique qualities you brought to their classrooms and both of them wrote me emails on occasion letting me know things they saw in you that they liked and appreciated.  You played percussion in the band until we left in March and seemed to enjoy it but weren't ever able to play in a concert since they were cancelled.  You didn't choose to stay with band and elected not to take choir in school this year too.  I said it was okay as long as you were progressing in piano and continued singing in miss Kellie's choir but as it turns out, miss Kellie hasn't been able to run her choirs this year anyway...  I was a little surprised that you didn't choose any music for your 6th grade electives but I didn't get in your way.  You did choose drama which surprised me a lot as you can sometimes be VERY shy when asked to be silly in front of people.  As it turns out, most electives were sort of cancelled this year any way so we'll see if you sign up again next year.  

We had such a crazy year, Tate.  We left for the states to go to Mallo and Carson's wedding on March 11th for what we thought would just be a few weeks with Dad meeting us at the end for the wedding and we'd just go home together!  It didn't turn out that way.  We got stuck apart until July and it was oh so hard.  We were so lucky to have ward members here who allowed us to stay in their homes while we were stuck.  We stayed in the Dibb's townhouse in American Fork for a month and then moved to the Bourne's home in Lehi for three more.  We really struggled doing virtual school, dealing with the constantly changing pandemic situation, being away from our home and without Glenn.  We all took our turns having sad days and break downs but the others always picked us up and helped us cheer up.  

There were so many tender mercies during those four months.  We were able to spend tons of time with Uncle Carson and Auntie Mallo.  You guys fell in love with Uncle Carson and it was so fun to see you guys get along so well.  We spent a lot of time with them and Nana and Grandpa and Kenzie and Tucker and Trevan.  It was very unusual in our expat life to have so much time to spend with family and we made the most of it.  We saw family at least a few times a week.  

Paul Weitzel introduced you and Finn to Dungeons and Dragons last year and it's taken over your life.  You pour over the books of monsters and characters and memorize all their stats.  Create story lines in your head and love to DM for your siblings.  While we were away he set up a Saturday morning game where you could play with Reece and Amelia and Glenn over zoom.  It was the highlight of your week.  You even asked Paul to DM for your Dungeons and Dragons birthday party this year with some of your friends.  You had the greatest time making labels for your chosen food items that were D&D themed and were so excited to share D&D with your buddies.  

It was a huge tender mercy to be able to be there for Mallo's wedding.  The temples were closed by the time her wedding date rolled around and that meant that you kids could attend her wedding!  It was a very special day.  Not at all like any of us imagined. But kind of perfect none-the-less.  I hope you remember the spirit we felt as we watched our sweet Auntie Mallo marry her sweetheart.  It was so cool, Tate.

We spend a LOT of time outside while we were in Utah.  Luckily, we were staying close to AF canyon so we would hike at least once a week.  You guys were at just the ride ages to be able to climb and hike for a few miles and not get too tired or grumpy.  We saw animals and bugs, you were constantly searching, especially at the beginning of our stay before it warmed up, for patches of snow and begged everyone to have a snowball fight with you!  You didn't care how freezing you got you just HAD to have a snowball fight!  

When things started to open up a little bit we took a day trip to Goblin valley and you guys had the greatest time climbing around and hiking for a few hours.  We also went to the aquarium with Mallo and Carson and the Thanksgiving Point farm with Kenzie and Tucker.  Lots of walks, lots of time on the trampoline.  We also had a wildfire near the Bourne's house while we were there and an earthquake as well!  It was a wild ride, Tate.  And while you had days when you just couldn't cheer up, most of the time you did a pretty good job looking at the positives and trying to see the blessings in the muck.  

Virtual school was okay last spring.  Not your favorite, but it was okay.  You'd watch the videos, do the work and send in pictures of worksheets and writing that you did.  You were sad to be ending the school year that way and worried about all the what ifs.  What if we didn't get home before school started again?  What if we never get to go back to school in person?  What if we're stuck here for Christmas?!  It was a lot for a kid to digest.  Especially when the situation was changing day by day.

We finally got to go home on July 7th and it was just the best trip across the world we've ever had.  In spite of the worry and all the luggage and flights and little sleep and having to wear a mask all day, you and your siblings didn't complain at all.  You helped me and each other.  You practically skipped through the airports.  You were patient as we figured out the bus situation in Dammam and waited anxiously for the bus to pull up at our house where you ran off the bus and into your Dad's arms.  You'd grown a lot in those four months and he was surprised to see how tall you were.  It's been a BIG could of years for your growth Tate.  You'll pass me up not to long from now, kiddo.  

We spend the next two weeks in quarantine and it was heaven.  Your dad bought a switch while we were away because he was SO bored without us so you guys played a lot of video games together and we read and swam in our backyard pool and snuggled for games and movies.  It was the most blissful two weeks all to ourselves.  

The rest of the summer was spent doing our morning routine and then swimming in the pool or playing with friends.  This year we added exercise to our daily routine and you took to the treadmill like a fish to water.  Your dad and I were so surprised at how we never had to ask you to get some exercise and how we'd even find you on the treadmill on your day off on Saturday.  Some days you'd run for just 2 miles and sometimes as much as 4.  Just because.  We've been so excited to see you find something physical that you enjoy, Tate.  It's such an important part of keeping your body healthy.  I hope you always have some way of moving that you like and for now, it's definitely running.  A few months ago you joined the run club that Lindsey Law set up on camp.  Kids from 5-12 grade get together and run twice a week.  One slow run and one speed work.  You do not love the speed work day.  No one does.  But you're doing it.  And even though we tell you you don't need to, you often get on the treadmill on days you have run club too!  You watch a show while you run and I think it's a fun little zen part of your day.  You look forward to it and I'm just so glad.

This year you've progressed a lot in piano as well.  You're in the level 5 book and learning those songs pretty capably on your own.  I help sometimes with counting but you're doing really well.  More than once Glenn has walked in and expressed surprise that you are the one playing the piano when he thought it was me.  You've learned a few theme songs from star wars or zelda and you love to play those when people come over or when there's a piano at someone else's house.  

We started the school year online and it was a LOT of time in front of a screen.  You'd have class from 9-3 every day.  We were beyond thrilled when we finally were able to go to a hybrid schedule in November.  You go to school four afternoons a week for your core classes, science, social studies, language arts, and math.  And then you have your specials classes in the morning on google meets which are, art, Spanish and PE.  You also have a D&D club with Andrew Redmon once a week at lunch that you look forward to all week.  We're hopeful that more will open up before school ends but we'll just have to see how it goes!

You went from really hating to write in 4th grade to LOVING to write in 6th.  That transition started in 5th grade and getting so much faster at typing.  Hand writing has never been your favorite but as you've progressed in typing it's opened up so much more fun for you in getting those amazing ideas in your head down on paper.  You love to write books and have a few in the works.  You'll get an idea in your head, always fantasy or fan fiction, and just take off, writing page after page.  I feel very lucky that we have such a good relationship and that you want me to read them and give you feedback.  It's been such a fun glimpse into your creative mind this year.  

On November 30th we went to the states to visit the Makechnies for a week and a half.  It was so nice to see them all, especially Grandpa Arthur.  You family loves you, Tate.  Uncle Gregor played games with you and came up with crazy questions to ask you about D&D.  Amy wants to know about the books you're reading.  You could sit and snuggle with those two puppies all day long.  It was a great visit with the Makechnies and I'm so glad we went.  I love seeing you kids in New Hampshire.  It's such a beautiful and ideal place to be a kid.  So much to explore and people who really love you.  

We surprised you guys after our NH trip and spend a week in Disney World together.  It was the most wonderful trip, Tate.  You and Finn could ride everything and were excited and brave.  You encouraged your sisters and cheered them on when they were nervous.  You shared treats and rode smaller rides to please them.  It was a truly magical week together as a family and so healing in many ways too.  Disney did a fantastic job keeping things safe and clean and we felt totally relaxed and able to play and just be together.  I hope you remember moments like those, Tate.  When we build stronger bonds as a family because we just like to be together.  We're as different as 6 people can be, but we've got each other's backs and we just like each other and have fun together.  We are an awesome team.

I should really keep track of how many books you read.  The problem is, that now you have Sora, which is a book library through the school on your laptop so you read books on there every week and I never even know!  You borrowed the Hobbit a few months back and read the whole thing in less than 24 hours.  You're on the two towers now and we'll watch the movie as soon as you're done.  We're still getting through book 7 of Harry Potter.  It's taken us a long time because we don't get to read together every night and I want to read it with you!  You would have finished it on your own long long ago.  It's incredible how fast and how much you read, Tate.  Absolutely incredible.  It's something you truly love and that you're proud of as well.  

I've watched you grow SO much this year, Tate.  You have become so responsible and calm.  You still have moments when you let your worry spiral out of control but they really are fewer and farther between than they used to be.  Something magic happened with virtual school.  There was something about the degree of ownership and responsibility required, paired with a maturity and readiness in you.  You stay on top of your work, you're getting good grades, when you don't understand something or a link isn't working, you write professional and respectful emails to your teachers.  You still have things you're working on but you're trying really hard to balance reaching your potential with recognizing and dealing with your stress level.  It's been so amazing to watch this year.  I'm so proud of this 12 year old kid you've become and the maturity you carry all of a sudden.  

You were a little nervous to receive the priesthood, just knowing that it was a responsibility and knowing that you wanted to bear it well.  You do, kiddo.  It's been so wonderful to see you pass the sacrament to our family every week in the family room. To see the spirit you carry with you and the contributions you make to our come follow me discussions.  I've loved the way your YM leaders have planned activities to help you grow and enjoy the awesome group of youth we have here.  It's a camelot for the youth in so many ways.  Lots of boys your age and great leaders in a protective environment where nearly every member of our ward are active in the church.  It's crazy and awesome.  You'll never see another ward like it.  

Your memory is absolutely amazing, Tate.  If I ever forget a fact or detail I just ask you.  Once I was quoting something from Elf and you actually corrected me.  "It was 11 cookies, Mom."  What?  "It was, 11 cookies that he shoved into the VCR, Mom."  Seriously, who remembers things in that detail?  You do!  Last week your toast fell "lemon curd side up". Yeah Tate, you love lemon curd so much you actually got some in your stocking.  And I said, "Tate how did that happen?!  It's statistically impossible!"  You replied, "Actually mom, toast falls butter side up 2 times out of ten.  So while extremely rare, it's not statistically impossible."  I said, "WHATTT?!" And you responded that you had read that fact on a poster at the Denver museum of nature and science a few years ago.  Seriously, Tate.  It's incredible.

You're becoming a better eater and I can usually convince you to eat a few bites of whatever I've come up with for dinner.  But you'd still prefer sandwiches, mac and cheese, pasta, or pizza if given the choice.  But you really love breakfast.  Pretty much any breakfast I make just makes you so happy.  You're easy to please at breakfast time.  You've started to really enjoy cooking too.  You made your own birthday cake last year and once in a while on Fridays you just decide you want to bake sometimes.  Sometimes it's creme brulee, sometimes it's a batch of cupcakes with piped frosting.  It's adorable.  We're working on following recipes, but you'll get there because you really love food so I think it's good motivation for you to figure out how to make things on your own.

Tate, boy do I love you.  I love reading with you in bed.  I love movie nights with the boys.  I love riding rides with you and baking with you and cleaning while jamming out to loud music with you.  I love seeing you play with your buddies, get super excited about video games, practice pieces of music until your work out problem spots.  I love seeing you share your books with your sisters because you can tell that they just want to be like you in any way they can.  Tate, I love you to bits.  I don't know how I got so lucky to be your mom but I truly am grateful for it every single day.  I learn so much from you and I love you fiercely.  You are going to do absolutely incredible things with your brilliant mind and your matchless heart, Tate and I cannot wait to watch.  

I love you so much, my Tate. Happy happy Birthday!

The world is yours, sweet boy.

Love,

Mom 

Dear Taryn,

 Dear Taryn,

Oh little missy you are 6!  You were so excited for your birthday.  Last spring just a few months after your 5th birthday you started asking frequently to list the holidays until your birthday.  You were pretty frustrated until the list got shorter this Fall and it sounded like, "Thanksgiving, then Finn's birthday, then Christmas, then New Years, then your birthday!"  You LOVE holidays, but you especially love the holiday all about you!  Your birthday this year was fun.  We ate all your and Kenna's favorite foods.  Cinnamon rolls for breakfast, cheese bread for lunch, and mac and cheese at Chili's for dinner.  You love to look at pictures of cakes in my cake cookbook and you've had your eye on a very pretty bubble gum cake for a year.  You wanted to change the frosting and drip colors and choose your own sprinkles.  We brought back gum-balls and bubble gum flavoring and spent days cooking together.  But then you took one bite and didn't love it.  It was very bubble-gumy in your defense.  Which you were unaware you didn't like very much.  So you ate a piece of Kenna's mint chocolate cake instead!  It was so funny.  

Your birthday party was a mermaid soiree with just a few of your and Kenna's favorite little people.  Lilly, Lucette, Clara, Amelia and Addie.  You had so much fun playing with them and I think it was the celebration you've been excited all year for.  And when you're excited, little miss, you have excitement bursting from your fingertips!  It's all-encompassing and rather exhausting and also really magical.  

You've had quite a year, little T.  You've grown so much in every way.  You're taller, stronger, your hair is longer, your tenderness softer, and your temper just as fiery.  You had a wonderful teacher in K4.  One of the saddest things about virtual school last spring for me, was knowing that you were missing out on a few more months of class with Ms. Nina.  She was SO good for you.  Positive and kind and fun and creative.  Always ready to intervene with a song or a mantra.  My favorite of which is, "Talk it out to work it out."  Which we say ALL THE TIME now at home.  You loved her so much because she loved you back.  It was so fun to come to class and have you be so excited for me to be there.  See you working hard and making buddies and trying SO hard to sit still and listen when you just wanted to wiggle or speak up.

Last year was a hard year, hon.  We left in March for Auntie Mallo's wedding, thinking that your Dad would be able to meet up with us in Utah for the wedding.  But the day after we arrived in Utah, Saudi closed the borders and we were stuck.  Every week we thought, "surely things will change and go back to normal and we can go home."  And every week, they didn't.  We spent 4 months away from your Daddy.  Kind ward members from Saudi let us stay in their homes in Utah while we were stuck.  We were so grateful for their generosity and care of us.  We stayed in the Dibb's house in American Fork for a month, and then in the Bourne's home in Lehi for 3 more.  The Bournes had closets full of toys and a trampoline outside and two beds for you girls and it was just perfect.  

We did virtual school every day, which for K4 consisted of watching a few videos and doing a craft or writing a few letters or numbers or going on a hunt to take picture of certain shapes or patterns or colors.  You loved those videos every day and did not so much love the letter or number flashcards or the bob books that I added for you just so you could keep some sort of progress and learning.  You missed being in class.  You loved the independence of getting on that bus, wearing your backpack, filling up your own water bottle and grabbing your own snack just like your brothers.  And having me in charge of all of the learning again was a step back you did not love.  But we made it.  It is very frustrating to you that you learn differently than your sister so we make sure to do things separately and differently as much as we can so you know you are doing well and I am proud of you!

We spent a lot of time in the mountains and you loved being out in the wild.  Climbing rocks in goblin valley, hiking in the woods, roasting marshmallows over a fire, throwing rocks into a stream, picking every wildflower you saw even when we had JUST asked you not to, finding bugs to watch and squirrels to tip toe towards just thrilled you to the core.  You have such a delicious sense of adventure, little T and it's contagious.  It also scares me just a bit as you're not usually nervous to be out of my sight or get too close to an edge, or look around before you throw a rock off a cliff just in case someone is below you... You just can't stand to be held back and I really try to do it as little as possible because watching you just go after life is an amazing thing to behold.  Being out in the sunshine and mountains was so good for us during our time in Utah.  We all had days when we just woke up sad and being away from your Dad was so hard.  But even when everything else was closed, we had the mountains and we made good use of them to get some exercise and take some deep breaths in the peaceful air.

We spent a lot of time with family in Utah which was unusual for us.  Most summers we only get a week in town with them so being around Mallo and Carson, playing with cousin Tucker, and visiting Nana and Grampa was so fun for you.  Any time we were bored you'd ask who can come over to play or if you had an idea to go somewhere you asked who was coming with us.  It was nice to have so many memories built with people who just love you during what could have been solely a yucky and dark time.  When things opened up a bit we went to the aquarium, spend a couple weekends playing in Park City, did a couple of escape rooms, played at parks, rolled down hills, flew kites, made sidewalk chalk masterpieces, and raced snails across the sidewalk.  

Finally on July 7 we were able to get on a plane to go home.  It should have been a really difficult day, flying across the world with all the worry and uncertainty of a pandemic with so much luggage, wearing masks all day, and very little sleep.  But Taryn, I will never forget that day.  I will never forget how kind you and your siblings were to each other.  How patient and positive and happy to be alive you were all day no matter what obstacles we faced, how few options we had for food, how many cranky people we interacted with, how many hours of sleepless travel, we were all so happy to FINALLY be going home, nothing seemed to phase us for long.  

When we arrived home and you stepped off that Aramco bus you practically flew into your Daddy's arms and hugged him so tight.  You watched him shave his beard he grew while we were away and went to sleep in your own bed for the first time in four months with the sweetest peaceful smile on your face.  We spent the next two weeks in the greatest quarantine.  Snuggling and movies and games.  Lazy mornings, so many books, and so many hugs.  It was blissful.  

We spent the rest of the summer just laying low.  We went to the beach almost every week, swam in our little backyard pool every day, sometimes multiple times a day, played video games and board games, did our workbooks and chores, and just relaxed together.  School started too soon, virtually as we expected.  Your teacher, Ms. Ami, seems to be a really good fit for you.  She's kind but firm and you really like her.  We did virtual school from August until November when we were finally able to go to a hybrid schedule which means you do a little video specials class in the morning and then you go to school for a couple of hours in the afternoon with half of your class.  You love getting on that big bus with your brother Finn and sister and you always get off it so happy and excited to tell me about the things you learned and did.  

It'll be interesting to see how school goes for you next year.  For everyone, really.  Because this year has been such a different experience for school.  A lot of virtual followed by just not enough time in person.  I'm so grateful for the hybrid schedule but I just know there are some things that you need that aren't quite able to happen this year because of the limitations of COVID and the school.  You're a smart girl and a strong girl.  I know you'll be just fine if you set your mind to it.  You almost always get what you set your mind to little lady.

On November 30th we went to the states to visit our family in NH and it was so wonderful.  We spent a day skiing and playing in the snow, did some shopping, and spend every night at the Emery Road Makechnie house playing with the dogs, wrestling with cousin Nelson who was doing his at home MTC, reading books with Grandpa Arthur, baking with Uncle Gregor, taking walks with Auntie Amy and cousin Paige, or painting nails with cousin Cope.  It was a wonderful week of reconnecting and deep breaths of cold winter air.  You couldn't get enough.  The cold or mud didn't bother you one bit.  

On our last day in NH we surprised you and told you our next week would be spent in Disney World.  We had the most amazing time riding rides, eating yummy food (your favorite was the Gaston cinnamon rolls!) exploring and playing together.  There were just a few rides that you were a touch too short for.  And while I'm not sure if you would have loved them as you're still just a little nervous about wild rides, you were none too keen on being the one left out because Kenna was just that magic one inch taller than you.  While we rode those rides you'd take off with your Dad and get a treat or ride something else just the two of you.  Taryn, you have the greatest dad.  He is such a softie in your hands.  He loves you so much and wants you to be oh so happy.  One of my favorite things about Disney World was watching how your brothers interacted with you while we were in line for a ride you didn't remember or hadn't been on before.  They'd put their arms around you, change the tone of their voices to a gentle and animated tone to describe what would happen on the ride in great detail so that you would know what to expect and not feel afraid.  It was so sweet to watch them become your mentors and to see you listen to them in a special way because they're your big brothers.  You rode some big rides, and while I'm not sure if they were your favorites, you were so brave and just loved the adrenaline of big dips and fast corners.  It was a magical and healing week for our family to be able to have such a grand adventure together after such a hard year.  

We got home a week before Christmas and it was a wonderful Christmas.  You asked Santa for a lollipop and he brought you a whole package of lollipops and it might as well have been the moon for how excited you were.  We spend some time in the states shopping for Finn who you gave to this year and you picked out the most thoughtful gifts for him.  Your excitement watching him open his presents might have been the best part of your Christmas.

Oh my Taryn, what a year.  It's been so full and hard and really great too.  You ask all the time when COVID will be over and I wish I had an answer for you.  Most of the time you've been able to roll with the punches this pandemic throws your way, but once in a while you get socked down and reminded when you see that basket of ballet clothes in the closet that we can't have ballet class right now, or when you want to sell lemonade on the corner that we're still in the middle of a pandemic and we really can't pass out lemonade right now.  I know honey.  I want it to be over too.  But we're all together.  And if we learned one thing this year, it's that our family can do pretty much anything together, babe.

You, little lady, are a whirlwind of creative energy.  You love to pull paper out of the closet and color or water paint or stamp or create a colored pencil masterpiece (rainbows are your specialty of the moment) and then write a note on the back to give to someone you love, usually with some small treat taped to it and sometimes tied with a curling ribbon.  You leave a shower of things in your wake but I try hard not to slow you down because watching your brain create is a feat to behold.  You have very little patience for sitting down for reading practice, but you and your sister can spend hours over days creating and decorating a box to turn it into the perfect doll house or stuffed animal house.  And hours scheming over the perfect design for your fairy house or welcome sign to put in the flower pot next to the fairy house.  You love to create, you love to pick out your own clothes, and you love anything with sparkles or shine or glitter.  You ask me at least once a week if you can wear my makeup yet and having painted fingernails or fancy shoes shifts the way you carry yourself entirely.  

You love to eat.  You have a real sweet tooth.  If we let you I think you'd eat lolly pops all day long.  But you also LOVE macarons (especially when you get to make them with me.  Basically you like to stick your finger in the batter and choose the colors and flavors of cookies and frosting).  You love ice cream and any kind of cookie.  You also love any kind of fruit, you'll tolerate a potato or cauliflower, but you'll eat chicken and rice without much complaint.  You love fruit juice and that's usually your treat of choice when we go to the com together.  You prefer your pasta with white sauce and your apples sliced and with peanut butter.

Taryn girl, I just adore you.  Your enthusiasm about things that make you happy is so sweet it makes my sweet tooth hurt.  And your fury is so quick and hot it burns up anyone who's too close.  You feel big and much.  It's a gift. And I'm sure it feels so hard sometimes too.  You're working on it.  You're trying to stay in control and you have many moments of beautiful spontaneous kindness.  You gave away almost all of your halloween candy taped to notes to anyone and everyone you could think of.  Last week you started doing your chore and then you just kept the vacuum out and vacuumed everyone else's zones too.  You have a big heart and a strong soul.  It's a marvel to behold, little one.  

Every so often I look at picture of you as a teensy tinsy little baby with a fuzzy head and calm clear eyes.  I miss tiny baby you.  Being able to hold all of you in my arms and meet all of your needs with just a snuggle or a song or a bottle of milk.  You are an incredible girl, Taryn.  So very smart, so very creative, so very strong.  I wish meeting all your needs was as easy as it was when you were that teensy baby, but just know, my girl that I love you fiercely.  I want you to be so very happy in your life and I am doing absolutely everything I can think of to meet your needs and to teach you what you need to know to be happy and successful. I am proud to be your Momma.  You are going to do incredible things and I, as always, am just glad to be along for the ride, sweetheart. 

Happy Birthday, little Taryn.  I love you so very much.

The world is yours, my girl.

Love,

Mom

Dear Kenna,

 Dear Kenna,

Oh my sweet girl you are 6!  I procrastinated writing your letter last year when you turned 5 until March and then COVID happened and we were stuck.  So this letter better be extra amazing after missing one year of letter-writing to the marvelous Kenna Makechnie!

Kenna girl you absolutely lit up in K4.  You weren't nervous in the slightest about getting on that little bus or going to school and had the best time in class with Ms. Allison.  I loved coming to "work" in your class every other week because you were so proud and happy to have me there and show me everything you were doing.  Your favorite spot in the classroom was the "maker table" where Ms. Allison brought milk cartons, take out containers, toilet paper rolls, tissue paper, anything and everything in a big box and you used it to make new creations every day and brought them home just glowing with pride at your new robot, mailbox, minecraft guy, etc.  It was a lot of stuff Kenna girl.  But it made you SO happy!  You loved coloring and often drew pictures for people and you loved writing stories and being able to read them to the class on the projector.  

In March we left for Utah to be at Auntie Mallo's wedding and we ended up getting stuck.  For four months.  Away from your Daddy, your toys, your craft closet, your bunk bed, your life in Saudi.  It was really hard.  You were so happy for your Auntie Mallo and you absolutely adore her man, Uncle Carson.  He is endlessly sweet to you and you poured a lot of fatherly affection on him while you were away from your Dad.  He couldn't sit down without you or Taryn climbing into his lap like you belonged there.  It was so sweet for you and your siblings to be able to attend Auntie Mallo's wedding since the temples were closed.  You wore a beautiful dress and had your own little bouquet which made you feel so special.  

We spent a lot of time in the mountains while we were in Utah.  We stayed in the Dibb's house in American Fork for a month where you shared a room with your siblings and then we moved to the Bourne's house in Lehi for another 3 months.  They were SO good to us and we were so grateful to have a place to stay while we were stuck.  Both houses were close to AF canyon.  We went hiking at least once a week as everything else closed down and we desperately needed to be in some nature and feel some sunshine.  We haven't had much opportunity to hike as a family living in Saudi except for the one or two hikes we take each summer in NH.  It was wonderful to see how you and Taryn have grown and the stamina that you had to keep going and climb steep trails without too much whining.  Finding flowers, looking for bugs and critters and sometimes snow, made the whole experience so magical.  Sometimes we went alone, often we had company from Aunts, Uncles, Nana and Grandpa.  I loved holding your little hand as we climbed in the mountains together.

We did a lot of fun things in Utah.  When things opened up a bit we went the aquarium, we ate out or got takeout, went on lots of walks, colored with chalk, rolled down hills, flew kites, played at the high school track with Mallo and Carson, played on the trampoline in the Bourne's back yard.  You, Taryn and Finny raced snails you found in the garden.  You and your siblings were rock stars last summer.  You each took turns having sad days and worry days but you helped each other and played together and loved each other.  Seeing your relationships and how much you've all grown together is one of my most treasured takeaways from this year.

We did virtual K4 for almost all of those four months and it was not ideal.  Lots of crafts and maker challenges, lots of little number games or finding shapes, or coloring pictures.  We'd watch the few little videos and take pictures to send to your teacher back in Saudi.  But we also got a set of Bob books, made some number flashcards, and did a little school work on our own.  And all of a sudden, Kenna, you turned into a reader.  Letters and sounds started to click.  You took so much pride in finishing bob books with me or on your own and couldn't wait for our daily facetime with your Dad so you could show him your new skills.  On our last day in Saudi as I was packing boxes, you sat down with Auntie Mallo and asked her to help you write a note to me.  That was your first note, Kenna babe.  It said, "I love you, thanks for letting us go home."  It was a moment for me.  Feeling so stressed about all the cleaning and packing with such short notice.  So frazzled at how fast it all had to be done and worried about the trip across the ocean in such an uncertain time. And so excited to finally be going home again.  And you, little Kenna, you sensed all that.  And you just had to do something sweet to make it all feel less stressful.  

On July 7th we FINALLY were able to go home.  It was the easiest and happiest 24 hour trip we've ever had.  You and your siblings were exhausted but no one complained because you were just so happy to be finally going home.  You fell asleep on the Aramco bus the last ten minutes of the drive so your siblings rushed out before I could get you up but once we left the bus you ran, sobbing into your daddy's arms.  So tired and SO glad to finally be home.  Those next two quarantine weeks were just wonderful.  All together.  So many movie nights, game nights, afternoon snuggle parties.  It was a warm and cozy quarantine.

We spent the summer doing our workbooks and chores in the morning, swimming in our little backyard pool, playing games, playing with friends, and we went to the beach almost every weekend.  Even with all of the stress in the world and in our little corner of the world after all of the lock-downs and trauma of surviving covid in Saudi, our family was just so happy to be together, not much could bother us for long.  

You started writing notes and it's like you were doing it your whole life.  Mostly "I luv yoo". sometimes the o's are hearts.  You know how to write everyone's names in our family and you get very hurt if someone points out a spelling error because you put your whole heart into every kind gesture.  You're a deep feeler, Kenna love.  If anyone gets hurt, you're running for an ice pack or a bandaid.  If mom is stressed you say, "Thanks for being our Mom.  I know you're feeling stressed right now.  It's hard to be a mom, isn't it?"  You're very thoughtful and you notice details a lot of people miss.  I learn a lot from you, sweetheart.  I feel like I understand you at your core.  It's heavy sometimes to feel so much, isn't it?  But it's also a gift you have.  To notice and lift where you can.  But I must say, I'm pretty proud of you when I see you stand up for yourself or what you want because far too often you yield your own wishes to others.  I hope you know that you are important, and you deserve to be taken care of and have what you want too.

You are a good little eater.  You like sweets but you're usually fine with a bite or two.  You could eat fruit all day, especially bananas.  You know fruit is always okay so whenever you start to say, "I'm hungry.." you stop yourself and say, "Can I have a banana?!" You probably eat at least one banana every day.  You also love yogurt drinks, nectarines but not plums so much, apples but only if they're cut, any kind of berry, and you'll also eat bell peppers.  Your recent favorite is a crustless quiche that we've made a lot recently.  It's got a ton of broccoli but you can pack away at least two slices easily.  

We started virtual school in August and it was fine.  Fine but not great.  It's hard to sit in front of a screen for kindergarten and stay engaged but man, your teacher Mr. Graham sure did his best!  He had puppets and songs and silly games and you just adore him.  We were all celebrating when you were able to go back to hybrid school in November.  You do chores and one virtual special video in the mornings and then you go to school just for the afternoons four days a week.  Even with the distance and the masks you still love going to school. I'm SO glad you are able to go in person.  So many people still can't.  You've become such a great reader this year and you love sitting down with a pile of books.  If they're at your level you read them word for word, if they're not you just tell the story, whispering to yourself or to Taryn as you turn the pages and admire the pictures.  

On November 30 we were able to get out to NH to visit family.  Watching you run up the street to give Grandpa Arthur a big hug will be one of my favorite memories.  You just held him and he bent over to hug you for probably a minute.  You loved playing with cousin Paige and you had the best time going for snowy walks with Artie and Tenny, and Auntie Amy, completely undeterred by the snow and wind outside.  We spend one day skiing but you were only out there for a couple of hours and the rest of the time we played together in the snow.  You were enchanted by icicles and have the most creative ideas of imaginative play.  

We surprised you and took you guys to Disney World for the last week of our time in the states.  It was wonderful.  You were just tall enough to ride nearly every ride now.  An inch taller than Taryn so she missed out on a few and you completely surprised me by being a real dare-devil.  You loved the speed, the drops, and weren't bothered in the slightest by the darkness on some rides.  It was a shock to me to look at my little baby girl and realize that you're now a big kid who can play with me and your siblings in a whole new way!  You loved it all.  The music, the Christmas decorations, the characters who came by in unscheduled cavalcades, the rides, the shops.  It was all magic to you and watching you and your siblings be grateful and soak up the Disney magic made your Dad and I so happy and so proud.  It was a healing trip for us.  Being together and playing so much. 

Christmas was lovely this year.  We wished that Mallo and Carson could have visited us like they had planned but no visitors were allowed into Saudi so that wasn't possible.  We had a sweet, quiet Christmas at home and even went camping a couple of times over the long break.  You asked Santa for a locket with a K on it!  You gave very thoughtful gifts to your brother Tate that you picked out at Target and watching you and your siblings be excited to share those gifts was the sweetest part of Christmas by far.  

Kenna, I love you.  Your siblings love you.  Your Daddy is smitten with you.  You have the most gentle eyes, a sweet smile, and a heart that feels with others and wants to make the world a happier place.  You are a treasure to our family, my little lady.  It's been a hard year in a lot of ways, but it's been a good year for you.  Lots of growth.  Lots of love.  Lots of adventures.  And you have loved it all as only you can.  

I love and admire you so very much, my little one.  Happy Birthday, sweetie.

The world is yours, Kenna.

Love,

Mom

Dear Finn,

 Dear Finn,

Wow what a year! I can't believe you're nine.  This year of COVID both flew by and never seemed to end.  I had many moments of surprise at how you're growing and learning and changing when your church shoes that you haven't worn for 6 months suddenly didn't fit. Or you suddenly know how to spell words and are gaining more confidence and less frustration in school.  Those moments are surprising this year because so much seems to be at a stand still, a holding pattern, a wait and see.  But through it all, the time still passes and you still grow and change and become more of who you are going to be.  It's been so encouraging to watch you this last year, Finn.  You are an incredible boy. 

We celebrated your 8th birthday in Austria with our friends the Weitzels.  Then Christmas at home and the start of another school trimester in Dhahran.  You started another season of baseball playing with your friends with your dad as your coach.  So excited for the season.  Taryn and Kenna were playing for the first time last spring and you were so excited to show them the ropes.  Then February came around and we heard whisperings of a new virus. We thought everyone was over-reacting.  That it was just a flu bug and it would play itself out without much impact on our lives. Then March came and we very quickly realized that things could shift overnight.  We made a prayerful decision to move our tickets to the US up so we could make it to Mallory's wedding.  We left on March 10th thinking that Dad would join us in a couple of weeks for the wedding and then we'd all go home together.  We were wrong.  Two days after we arrived the borders closed to Saudi Arabia.  No one in or out.  We kept praying and hoping but that three weeks turned into four months of separation from our lives here in Saudi and from Glenn.  The best dad in the world.  

I'm so glad that we were able to celebrate your Auntie Mallo's wedding.  It was such a special day and it was really wonderful that you were able to be present for the wedding of your favorite Auntie as you wouldn't have been if COVID hadn't closed the temples and changed everything.  You met Uncle Carson for the first time at Nana's house and he immediately jumped into 007 with you and Tate and absolutely won you over.  We had so much fun with Mallo and Carson especially while we were stuck in Utah and having so much time to spend with the family was an unusual gift for us.  Living abroad means just a week or so of time with family each year but being able to see people we love once a week or even more frequently was awesome.  And eased the loneliness so much.  You had a special connection too with cousin Tucker.  He adored you and would babble back and forth with you and save his best smiles for you.  Your siblings were so jealous of his attention to your connection with him.  But it was pretty sweet.  You've always had that easy, magnetic way with little kids.  They're drawn to you and you just love them so much.

We spent a month living at the Dibb's home in American Fork.  All four of you slept in the same bedroom which made bedtime a little bit complicated.  But I think you also secretly loved the closeness during such an uncertain time.  Then we moved to the Bourne's house in Lehi.  It was much bigger and had a huge yard in a fun neighborhood.  We went on lots of hikes, walks, played on the trampoline, practiced piano and did chores.  We tried so hard to find fun things to do outside while the world was shutting down.  We were very lucky to be so close to AF canyon and always have that outside time available to us when everything else was gone.  You became an awesome hiker, pushing yourself and complaining very little.  We had facetime calls and scriptures with Glenn every day around lunch time before he went to bed.  Your poor dad was SO lonely and bored sitting at home all alone.  Much of the time we were separated Saudi was on full lock down without him being able to even go to the grocery store without an appointment.  It wasn't enough time with him, but at least we got to see his face.  And occasionally he'd be able to help you with school work if I was helping another kiddo.

We started virtual school right after we arrived and continued every day until the end of June.  Having school on Sundays was a little bit of a bummer and you just did not love sitting in front of an ipad for a few hours every day.  But you did it.  We'd do math worksheets, write stories, watch videos and then take pictures of all of your work every day and send it in to your teacher, Ms. Lynch.  Mr. Cager was your second grade teacher until he took another job within the company and Ms. Lynch took over the class for him ONE WEEK before they shut down the school and transitioned to virtual.  She did a great job.  But man, that was a lot to cope with all at once!  

You loved the science sections of virtual school when you were able to go outside with your sisters to examine plants or find soil samples.  Your favorite little adventure together was once we moved to the Bourne's house and their porch was covered with snails, you and your sisters would spend hours gathering them and "racing" them across the sidewalk.   And you loved tinker Tuesday.  It was basically a day to watch a few videos about a type of project, and then build or craft something.  I wish that I had more supplies or more energy to help you on those days because you absolutely loved trying to make something work and were so bugged if your lego man glider didn't glide the way you wanted it to from the second story balcony.  

Another highlight of our time in the states was our weekly facetime DnD games with the Weitzels and your dad on Saturday mornings.  It was so nice of Mr. Paul to coordinated that for us so you could see your friends and play together with your dad.  You've grown to really love DnD this year and I think those weekly games were a huge contributing factor.  You get really into the adventures and once came into me in tears "I lost my mace!"  You apparently didn't have a high enough roll and accidentally threw your mace into lava and it was gone.  But Mr. Paul noticed the trauma and you ended up acquiring a cimeter in the same game so everything was fine again. 

We went to a few appointments as things opened up more to try to get some testing for you to see if what was going on would be diagnosed as Dyslexia or Dysgraphia.  But the offices either were booked out for several months, or didn't have any testing for those specific issues so we left empty handed.  

We tried to make the time apart fun and you were so much help.  Making lunches, doing chores, helping your sisters, trying to cheer me up.  You had your sad days like the rest of us.  Days when you'd wake up and say to me through tears, "Mom, I don't know what's wrong but I just don't feel like I can be happy today."  I get that buddy.  It was hard.  We had a couple little weekend getaways in Park City.  One in the Arnold's house and one in a rental with Mallo, Carson, Nana, Grandpa, Kenzie, Trevan and Tucker over the fourth of July.  That was a fun last hurrah as little did we know we got a phone call on the 5th and Glenn had found us a way home.  The company was getting some employees through from Dubai and we were the first family to get spots on those flights because your dad had been pushing and working so hard to get us home.  We finally made it home on July 7th.  It was a great day. Airports were practically closed.  All the shops were closed, we wore masks on the whole trip.  The travel day was long and lots of waiting and worry.  But you kids were so excited to be going home it was a magical day.  No complaining.  No crying.  Just so happy and excited to be finally going home.  We got to quarantine for two weeks and it was the best two weeks of the year.  No school, no schedule, just movie nights, games, reading and playing and being together.  Glenn bought a new Nintendo Switch while we were away and you and Tate were ecstatic to have new games to play together when we got home.

You were baptized on August 14th in our little backyard pool.  We had planned your baptism for the day before Auntie Mallo's wedding but then when Glenn couldn't make it to the states that was obviously not happening.  It was not at all what I imagined your baptism being like, but after such a long wait, it was so perfect.  We had the Larsons and the Weitzels in the room and Mallo and Carson, Nana and Grandpa, Kenzie and Trevan and Gregor and Amy on zoom with us from around the world.  You asked Nana and Mallo to give the talks and they were so perfect.  It was small, filled with the spirit, and all about you.  I am so proud of you Finn.  You are full of fun and energy and busyness. But you're also so tender and you feel the spirit so strongly.  You said that night that when you were confirmed you felt the spirit stronger than you ever had before in your life.  It makes my momma heart so happy to know that you can recognize so clearly when the spirit is speaking to you.  I hope you always seek it out and know how crucial it's presence is in your life.

We took a weekend trip to Riyadh in September with the family which was really fun.  We listened to audio books and watched movies on the drive.  We went up in Kingdom Tower and visited chop chop square and ate some yummy food.  It was a healing adventure for our family that was initially filled with a lot of anxiety in an uncertain world and after a traumatic last travel experience.  

When school started it was virtual for three months.  Your teacher, Mr. Hjeresen is so perfect for you and works so hard to find ways to connect and check on you.  He's called a few times to encourage or offer suggestions and his greatest piece of advice is to just be patient with this year.  That 3rd grade is often a turning point for kids who are frustrated with writing and he often sees a huge increase in stamina and ability during this year.  You had google meets every hour with your class and you seemed engaged and happy to be there and then you'd have some assignments to work on in between the meets.  You'd finish all of your school work by lunch and just have practicing, chores and exercise during the afternoons.  Overall you took pretty well to virtual school but you were SO excited when classes started in person in November.   You're a social little being and you'd really missed being in a classroom with classmates and a teacher in person.  We moved to a hybrid schedule and had your specials classes in the morning and then went to school with half of your class in-person in the afternoons four days a week with Tuesdays remaining a Tinker Tuesday.  You were SO excited to be in the classroom again and weren't discouraged by the extra restrictions one bit.  

Your dad has been taking you out to play baseball every Saturday morning and it's the highlight of your week.  Sometimes your siblings come and sometimes friends from your baseball team show up.  We're still not allowed to have any kind of sports or activities so you're missing organized sports but luckily you have a wonderful daddy who can spend time helping you progress and have fun playing sports.

We were praying in every prayer this fall that the country would stay open and allow us to leave to visit Grandpa Arthur over the winter break and it happened!  We were able to leave on November 30th and get home on December 18th and then Saudi shut the borders for two weeks on December 21st!  You had the most wonderful trip.  You loved being in New Hampshire and were constantly asking questions like, "Mom, could I live here when I grow up?"   "How much money do I have to make to live in New Hampshire?"  It was different this year as we didn't stay with Gregor and Amy in their home.  We stayed in Patty's home, a teacher at Proctor who was out of town which meant our family time was different and limited.  But we were able to see them.  You snuggled with Grandpa in his recliner.  Played catch with Uncle Ian.  Had talks with Uncle Gregor, and played with the puppies and cousins.  Your favorite day was probably the day we went skiing.  We were lucky to get in a few runs when the lifts finally opened in the afternoon in Waterville Valley.  It was beautiful and so cold and the cold didn't bother you one bit.  You were all in on whatever errands or adventures we came up with and you were grateful and happy to just be in New Hampshire and all together.

We surprised you on our last day in New Hampshire and told you guys we had a trip to Disney World for the last part of our trip in the states.  You were such a gem the whole week.  Saying thank you after every ride and every treat and every meal.  So grateful and just overflowing with joy at being in Disney World together.  We felt really safe there with all the precautions Disney put in place and with slightly lighter crowds and a good game plan every day we had a lot of success getting all the rides in that we wanted to without feeling super stressed.  Your favorite rides were the rides that were big and fast and you started to balk a bit at the little kid rides, convinced that they held no thrill for you anymore now that you've tasted the speed of the big coasters.  You loved space mountain, the new Avatar ride (and you and Tate stayed up in our hotel room watching the movie for a few days with your dad and I so we could show you the backstory), test track, expedition Everest, and of course the new star wars rides, especially Rise of the Resistance.  You were an absolute joy to be around in Disney World and your attitude affected your siblings and parents so much.  You were quick to put your arm around the shoulder of your sisters if they were nervous and to tell them what the ride was like so they wouldn't be afraid.  Or to distract them if they were feeling tired and grumpy.  You were a leader in positivity and gratitude and man was it wonderful.  You still claim that Disneyland Paris is your favorite but maybe only slightly.  We spent a day at Universal Studios as well and there were a couple of big coasters that you passed on but the ones you rode you loved.  Very little fear and so much fun in your soul, little boy. 

We've spent a LOT of time in our home with our family this year.  SO much time.  You and Tate have become even closer this year because you've always had each other.  Scheming about a new fan-fiction story that you want to write together, a DnD campaign or move you want to try, building legos, or playing or talking about playing video games.  You're such good buddies and it's been a gift of this year of very little outside of the home, that you and he get along so well.  And that you are such a wonderful older brother to your sisters.  They adore you and you are always willing to read them a story, play a game with them or engage in a wrestling match.  

Finny, this was a year for the books. It was so hard and so great too.  You were a trooper in all the best ways this year.  You're a marvel and an example to me.  I love your infectious giggle.  I adore your goofy facial expressions.  I appreciate and can't live without your positivity and the way your natural disposition to look for the good brightens our home and our family.  Thank you for being you, my boy.  I just can't believe you've been my boy for 9 years.  Where did they go?!  

You are a gift to me and to our family, Finny.  I love you so so much.

The world is yours, Finn.

Love,

Mom